And Then I Had Teenagers

I didn’t blog last night…three days and I have already broke my resolution…funny! I have had a lot going on the past two days, well, the last 14 years. MY TWINS!!! I remember when they were little, and I was so clueless as to the amount of work that was involved in caring for twins. They were my first children, so I really didn’t know any better. I changed one diaper, then another. Fed one baby, and then another….up until a couple of years ago I thought I was doing pretty well, considering I am the only one raising them. ENTER THE TEEN YEARS…All they do is fight, watch tv, sleep, fight, ask me to buy them everything under the sun, fight and sleep. Did I mention that they FIGHT!! ALL DAY, it argument after argument, snide remarks, yelling and sometimes even hitting (Big no no in my book, always has been.) Please, don’t get me wrong I love my twins, but I am having a hard time getting them to get along with each other and with their younger sibling.) I seriously cannot believe that my children act this way…it’s disappointing.

After googling everything under the sun, I now know that this behavior is normal in most teens. I also know that having two of them at the same time magnifies a parent’s anxiety during the teen years.

 I noticed a pattern in the responses toward sibling rivalry…ATTENTION! Everything points toward making sure that the children who are fighting get more attention from their “parents.” Here is the problem…there are three children and only one of me. Furthermore, two of these children are facing the same phases in life and are unable to get the correct amount of attention from their only parent. I have come to the realization that no amount of attention in this world from me is ever going to equal the amount of attention they would get from two parents. It’s impossible, I’m only one person and there are three of them… No way, no how!

The solution (for me) is going to have stricter rules, a firmer hand, and a lot less yelling. I have to be both the good and the bad cop….it shan’t be easy, but it’s the hand I have been dealt and I have to learn grow with it. And in a way this will help me with my authority skills, so it’s a win/win. Raising twins is a whole different process than raising singles. I’m still learning, and doubt that this lesson will ever conclude. Hopefully, this means that the baby will be a piece of cake when she is 14, that’s what keeps me going anyways.

“Spare the rod and spoil the child”